Wednesday, March 25, 2009

The Dog Ate My Mouthguard and Other Stories

One more day for giveaway entries...scroll down to enter!

Here's something I know none of you have ever done before, because you are all much more organized than I am. You go to the grocery store and you are standing at the register congratulating yourself on how little you spent on food for the next x-number of days or weeks, and just as you slide your debit card through, you suddenly remember that there is no plan for supper that very night.

How could this happen? I wrote everything out! There must be something! What's in the freezer? Oh, right, nothing, that's why I'm here at the store. Okay, uh (visually scanning pantry shelves in your head) I could make-- No I can't that would use up the half the ingredients for Thursday's meal....How about- No, we already ate that....uh-oh.

You take the groceries out to the car and then run back inside the store for a chicken and side dish that will go with the already opened corn relish in the fridge, food you don't have to fuss over because when you get home, there are plants that have to go in the ground. Yes, your crisper is full of berry starters that you have been spraying with water to keep moist, and you need to get them out and into the garden so you can put food in your fridge and not plants. Mercifully, your husband comes home from his errand just as you start planting and he comes out to the patch to help. And then you serve supper, send him off to work, and congratulate yourself for getting those berries planted. But then you suddenly remember that there are early spring seeds that have to go in the ground too, so you are back out there trying to make a straight row for spinach and peas. When that's all done, you make a black walnut cake that sinks in the middle (wrong sized pan, too much flour, maybe both) but are relieved to discover that it is delicious anyway, and possibly worth all those hours of gathering, curing and cracking.

Finally, as you get ready for bed, you remember that in your travels, you forgot to spend another $15 on a mouth guard. The one that the dentist told you to get to protect your teeth from clenching and wearing down as you sleep. The one you had been using was devoured by the dog. It's your own fault for not putting it in the protective case. A wave of relief washed over you when he vomited it up at five in the morning. And this may be the only time you were glad to hear your dog vomit.

And then when you return to work, you find this in your in box:
"Do you think their should be higher standards of graduation for high schools to prevent the number of illiterates?" (e-mail message from a high school senior who is writing an article on the topic of adult literacy.)

The long-awaited black walnut cake. A piece from the more mountainous region.


  1. Yes, "their" should be! And LOL about the mouthguard. I actually know someone else whose dog ate the mouthguard. They should stop making them in chuck roast flavors!

  2. You crack me up! Heck yeah, we've all done that, even to the point that I've gotten on the phone and ordered pizza after I got home from the grocery store!!! I must've had a long day. Wait until you have teenagers and you get home after spending $100+ and they say, "We don't have anything to eat, when are you going to shop?"

    Your cake looks delicious, by the way - and you cracked your own walnuts?? Don't tell me - homemade frosting?? You go, Mennobrarian!! Love the blog. :)

  3. Ok Monica I was hoping this wasn't true..But as I read I think it is.. No the dog didn't eat the mouthguard? Do you sleep the way your mind wonders? lol.. Are you really putting peas in ? and other goodies? Still looking at snow on my garden. It is melting..
    How about sharing that great looking walnut cake ... looks yummy!
    Blessings Brenda/haflinger

  4. I find it interesting that in some of the cases for adult literacy those same folks were in government education and were expected to know certain words by a certain grade and if they didnt it was "oh well the next teacher will teach them" my nephew has only a 5th grade reading level because of this kind of attitude unfortunatly his child home life left him to drop out of school and care for his younger siblings while his mother was strung out, anyhow I even know this to be true in my own daughter and son prior to taking them out of public and now home schooling the school was going to let them go on to the next grade DESPITE OBVIOUS testing and results that my kids were NOT ready..... Thats when I am thankful the LORD said you will home school not one child but both..... Glad I listened because now my daughter is caught up to the Math level she should be in(by age) and she has fallen in love with reading and is reading books some 7th graders wont touch now a days.... serious old classics.... Great post and sorry about the mouth guard...ewww maybe the dog needs one too. ha ha

  5. I have to tell you that is was only a little while ago that I actually figured out your Librarian: the original search engine. I thought it was just a banner for some search engine you use. Than one day, BAM!!! It hit my like a ton of bricks. Why didn't I see that before? Shame on you for not explaining it to me. LOLOL

  6. Thanks so much for hosting the giveaway! You know, I have several large black walnut trees. I have never done anything with them except give away an occasional green one to treat friends kids ringworm. Could you please tell me how to harvest know. And I would love the cake recipe too. I just love black walnuts in anything.


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